Dilemmas of a stay-at-home mum

10 Feb

Today I spotted a job vacancy at the local hospice where I worked before having the children. The job would have been pretty perfect for me and was actually quite similar to the one I was doing before I left. Reading through the job details I started to get excited at the thought of working again, earning some ‘proper’ money and contributing to the mortgage and bills would certainly be a good thing.  I started mentally working out how I would juggle child care and how I would fill in the gaps between pre-school and school. I then started to think how I would manage if one of the children were ill.  How would my boss react if I was having to take days off to look after poorly children? How would I feel if my child was sick and I wasn’t able to be there for them?

At that moment my little man came over to me with his ‘Tiddler’ book and said “Mummy can you read me this?” My eyes welled up and I started to think “Oh my goodness,  I’m going to miss so much!”  Maybe I have been spoilt being a stay-at-home mum. I know plenty of mums work long hours and just have to cope with these kinds of dilemmas but to be honest I don’t think I could do it.  They are little for such a short amount of time and I don’t want to miss out on one minute.

The last 5 years have not been easy, money has been tight and being a stay-at-home mum on a budget is hardly glamorous. I am definitely NOT one of ‘the ladies who lunch brigade’. My life involves dashing between playgroups, swimming lessons, school runs and the post office, fitting in  my ‘Green Mums’ work when I can.  I definitely miss that feeling of responsibility and importance that you get from having a career of your own. I know mums who have gone back to work and found that they can be a better parent – their life feels more ‘balanced’ and I can totally understand that. It’s a very emotive subject for mothers and one that I struggle with a lot of the time.

So, I closed my laptop and went to read my son ‘Tiddler’. Job applications will have to wait for another time because I already have an important job being ‘Mummy’


6 Responses to “Dilemmas of a stay-at-home mum”

  1. Ali February 10, 2012 at 2:43 pm #

    Oh gosh, it is such a dilemma and I don’t think there are any right answers on this one are there?! No matter what a parent decides they lose out on something! We are all trying to get the balance right and I think most of us are not quite there! Maybe it is impossible! Work is so important to me and I miss my children when they are at school or with someone else and I know my hubby feels the same. Not much help but I just wanted sympathise! Xx

  2. Not Just A Mummy February 10, 2012 at 5:48 pm #

    there will be a right time to go back to work and when you are ready there will be that perfect job for you somewhere…well i keep telling myself that, ive got nowhere so far so ive gone back to college hoping to boost my prospects but i still get the guilt feeling of missing stuff

    • greenmumsblog February 10, 2012 at 8:24 pm #

      Being a mum and feeling guilty seem to go hand in hand don’t they. Hope you find something soon x

  3. lucy wilson February 23, 2012 at 7:11 pm #

    It’s such a hard dilema and surely something that every parent must go through. It took a failed attempt at going back to work for me to realise that I would rather scrimp and save and enjoy the early years. of course I am lucky to have this luxury. I hope you manage to come to an arrangement that suits you and your family.



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