Well now, that was a big surprise

My gorgeous children

When I found out I was pregnant with my first child, I was of course over the moon . That was five years ago now and I can’t believe how much has changed since then.  I used to be a career woman, I loved my own space, loved to read and relax, liked to buy nice things. My priorities have become rather different since then.

I had an idea of the type of mummy I would be and I have to say that it was nothing like the mummy that I am.  I never thought for a minute that I would use cloth nappies on my children (let alone end up starting a business around them!), I didn’t really think I would breastfeed and I didn’t imagine for one minute that I would resign from my  job at a local hospice in order to be a stay at home mum.

When my baby arrived my grand plan went out the window.  She looked up at me for the first time, our eyes met and everything else just faded into insignificance.  I have become a different person.  Some things I think have changed for the better.  I have changed my outlook on life, I have broadened my horizons, learnt new things, met new people.   I have learnt how to love unconditionally even when exhausted through lack of sleep and sore nipples.

Some things have changed for the worse.  I have very little relaxation time, we have no money, I have less patience…  I’m not the perfect mummy that I wanted to be but then, who is? My relationships have changed. Visits with old friends are few and far between and I have made new friends through my children. I now have to share my parents with two demanding children who will always be centre of attention and that’s just as it should be.  My husband and I have very rare nights out and if we do we are usually home before 10pm.

So if anyone tells you that becoming a parent won’t change you, don’t believe a word of it.  If you do, you’ll be in for a big surprise. How has becoming a parent changed you? Or do you feel that you have not changed at all?

A father’s day post for my Dad

Me and my brother, having fun with my Dad!

As father’s day approaches I thought it would be a good time to tell you all about my dad.  I don’t suppose he will ever read this, he’s not the most technological person when it comes to the computer and the internet!  I don’t think he’s ever ordered anything online and the last I heard he didn’t have a cashpoint card so had to go into the bank everytime he had to draw out some money.

My dad is one of the most down-to-earth, honest and hard-working men you could wish to meet.  He’s from a farming family and is very traditional in his ways.  Lunch and tea are always served at the same time, always roast on a Sunday – you know the sort of thing.  He’s always instilled in me a sense of family fun and he’s usually the one to initiate a game of cards after tea or a traditional family game.  He’s definitely got a competitive streak when it comes to card playing and I know he got this from his parents as it always used to get very excitable when they all played a game together!

My dad is a passionate gardener and he encouraged me to help him grow things from a very young age.  I even had my own little vegetable plot when I was 6 or 7 years old.  He now has a huge plot and grows all sorts of fruit and vegetables.  I love visiting it with the children and watching him push Lily and Thomas around in the wheel barrow.  It seems like only yesterday that he was doing this with me.

We don’t have the kind of relationship where we talk about our feelings but I know that I can always go to my dad if I have a problem.  He always listens and is always there if I need him.  He doesn’t give advice, he’s a firm believer that you have to make your own way in life and to learn from your own mistakes.  I remember my childhood being filled with fun, family and adventures.  I always remember feeling safe, confident and happy and I hope I can pass this onto my children so that they have the same start in life.

I know many people are not as lucky as me, they no longer have their father’s in their lives and this feels me with a real sadness.  I can’t imagine life without my dad, nor do I want to.  I’m a lucky girl and I will remember that always.